I am going Private ~ It's time.

If you want to be included you need to let me know.  You will have to sign in using your email and a password.  We have found a RAD doctor.  Our prayers have been answered.
With that said there are some changes that will be happening.  There can be no more contact with the boys from the biological family.  If you'd like to keep up with them send your email address, I will add you to the blog.  I tried it my way for 5 years.  It is not working.  Imagine trying to be a child and you are starting to make progress in healing from the past.  And every birthday and Easter, Christmas you get a card from well meaning people who say I love you ~ I miss you wish I could see you.  Never forget us and the times we shared.  You are my _______.(Fill in appropriate relationship)  It takes them right back not just to the good memories, but the bad as well.  I can't control going to the store where people bring their abuse into the public eye. I can avoid most bridges, I can avoid neighborhoods, and honestly I could have controlled the blast from the past from day one.  But I had hoped that my children knowing lots of people loved them would out weigh the bad.  I was wrong.  It has kept them in turmoil.  We have 2 RAD children.  One has a 20% chance of recovery.  The other is much higher chance, but things have to change for that to happen.  Some have respected boundaries.  Other's have stomped on them.  And for the one who sent the mother's day card ~ Thank you.
But it comes down to a quote "Our scars remind us the past was real and the future must be different"  I realize some of you are paying the consequences for other's crimes. And for that I am sorry.  Yes Neglect and Abuse is a crime.   And that is another reason I had never stopped the contact prior. But the truth is actions of others have a rippling effect. We are sorry it has to be this way.
We are asking people who love our family to please love them enough to let them go...so they can finally heal.
It was pointed out to me that our children have given Dan & I so much.  This is true.  I won't deny it.  We are a family.  And watching their triumphs have gladden our hearts. But watching the pain, that I must minimize. I will continue to keep updates going.  Once this is private I may go into more detail.  I WANT A MIRACLE ~ and for that to happen we have to put our trust in this DR.  It is such a relief, we finally have someone who understands!!  He described our child to us.  These children are our world ~ and we must do what we can and for them.
REMEMBER THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU ~ IT IS NOT ABOUT DAN & I ~ THIS IS ABOUT OUR CHILDREN!
Love to all of you, no matter what is in the past Dan & I love each and everyone of you.  We absolutely wish you the best in life.  And to those of you who have supported us ~ Thank you.  And we pray for everyone's understanding in our decision at this time.